Week 5 :: I Talk To It

• The night that I found out, C and I got in bed, we shut off the lights, I said some smart ass comment to him, so he turns his back on me and says "I'm not talking to you." I replied, "YOU'RE NOT TALKING TO ME? YOU'RE NOT TALKING TO ME? Well, WE'RE not talking to YOUUUUUU!"
• Next morning while C's standing on the other side of the bed getting dressed he goes "I can't be late this morning hun, so hurry up." I turn to look at him across the bed and say "The baby and I don't like your tone of voice." He turns his head toward the ceiling and says "Omigod, this is going to be the longest 9 months of my life." I have no idea who he was addressing that statement to. Cukoo.
• Last week I went out to eat dinner with a friend and he goes "Whadda ya wanna eat?" I said, "I don't want to eat udon but the baby wants to." He said "That shit may work on C but it don't work on me." We got udon. Damn straight we got udon. What baby wants, baby gets.
• Last friday as I was sipping my coffee (I was told 1 small cup a day was ok) I kept eyeing this can of coke that has been sitting on my desk for a week. I, if you know me, am a coke fiend. I tilted my head down so no one could hear me and whispered "Hey! Hey! Mommy wants to know if you want coke? *pause* Ok fine. Sprite it is." I locked the can of coke in my drawer. How dare you try to make me lust for you you red skank.
• Last night C said "You wanna get some ice-cream?" I said "Sure!" After 30 minutes I see him lying on the sofa so I started bitchin and he said ok let's go. We went into the bedroom so I could change. As I'm changing he's lying in bed and says "You want ice-cream? Beg me." Pishaw! I pulled out the neck of my t-shirt, tilted my head down so that my mouth went in and said "Daddy doesn't care about our well being because he's a fat asshole."

He's right. It is going to be a long 9 months for him.